1
00:00:03,150 --> 00:00:04,670
Have we got any brown sauce?

2
00:00:05,070 --> 00:00:06,070
Just a minute.

3
00:00:08,250 --> 00:00:10,690
Somebody's eaten my muesli. Oh, well,
Friday.

4
00:00:11,050 --> 00:00:12,830
I can't eat those. They're full of E
-numbers.

5
00:00:13,070 --> 00:00:16,230
Then spit the E -numbers out and leave
them on the side of your plate.

6
00:00:16,530 --> 00:00:17,910
I've got to have a salad cream.

7
00:00:18,150 --> 00:00:19,150
Hang on.

8
00:00:28,910 --> 00:00:30,770
It's all right. I used lemon curd.

9
00:00:33,490 --> 00:00:36,530
I need to talk to you while your
father's still out with Harry.

10
00:00:37,190 --> 00:00:39,010
Do you realise what happens this month?

11
00:00:39,710 --> 00:00:41,330
The Eurovision Song Contest?

12
00:00:41,550 --> 00:00:42,550
That's in May.

13
00:00:42,690 --> 00:00:45,050
I don't think knowing that is anything
to be proud of.

14
00:00:45,270 --> 00:00:47,090
It's nearly your father's birthday.

15
00:00:47,910 --> 00:00:53,590
Oh, right. What shall we do about it?
Forget it. No presents, no mentions of

16
00:00:53,590 --> 00:00:54,289
at all.

17
00:00:54,290 --> 00:00:56,600
Why? When you get to his age, you'll
know.

18
00:00:57,180 --> 00:01:02,980
And most of all, no mention of that
particular number. If we can avoid that,

19
00:01:02,980 --> 00:01:03,980
might just have a chance.

20
00:02:20,750 --> 00:02:21,750
Birthday soon.

21
00:02:22,510 --> 00:02:23,850
I didn't say anything.

22
00:02:24,110 --> 00:02:25,790
You only told us five minutes ago.

23
00:02:26,170 --> 00:02:27,930
And you had to remind me.

24
00:02:28,350 --> 00:02:29,350
It's not that.

25
00:02:30,230 --> 00:02:31,330
We'll soon be dead.

26
00:02:31,750 --> 00:02:35,630
It's nothing. It's just a number. You're
still young. Don't make yourself

27
00:02:35,630 --> 00:02:37,230
prematurely old before your time.

28
00:02:37,510 --> 00:02:38,249
You think so?

29
00:02:38,250 --> 00:02:39,209
Of course.

30
00:02:39,210 --> 00:02:40,210
Forty's nothing.

31
00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:41,410
I'm not forty.

32
00:02:41,890 --> 00:02:45,810
How old are you then? I'm thirty...
something.

33
00:02:47,110 --> 00:02:48,830
I thought it was about thirty.

34
00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:50,470
What would that make me?

35
00:02:50,770 --> 00:02:52,210
An immaculate conception?

36
00:02:53,210 --> 00:02:57,110
I'm worried about him being depressed
like this.

37
00:02:58,370 --> 00:03:00,230
It's half past seven. I don't want to be
late.

38
00:03:01,090 --> 00:03:02,710
How old do you think he is, then?

39
00:03:03,170 --> 00:03:05,770
Well, the hairs in his nose have
definitely increased.

40
00:03:06,130 --> 00:03:09,850
That happens about that age, you know.
How thin is he? I noticed that.

41
00:03:10,130 --> 00:03:12,210
When he goes upstairs, he gets
breathless.

42
00:03:12,430 --> 00:03:13,530
I'm 38, OK?

43
00:03:13,810 --> 00:03:14,810
38!

44
00:03:17,900 --> 00:03:19,500
He'll be going grey soon. Finished?

45
00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:23,520
Nope. Yes, you have. Go and get your
things ready. They are ready.

46
00:03:23,740 --> 00:03:26,040
I'm middle -aged. Of course you are.

47
00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:30,160
You're supposed to be middle -aged. You
are not middle -aged. Bye -bye, David.

48
00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:33,080
38 times 2 is 76.

49
00:03:33,940 --> 00:03:36,240
That's as old as any man gets, and I'm
right in the middle.

50
00:03:36,620 --> 00:03:37,599
Harry's 11.

51
00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:39,800
That's 77 in dog years, and he's OK.

52
00:03:40,480 --> 00:03:41,480
Dog years?

53
00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:43,300
One dog year is seven of ours.

54
00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:48,640
766 in dog years.

55
00:03:48,900 --> 00:03:49,900
Bye -bye, Jenny.

56
00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:51,200
Have a nice day at school.

57
00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:56,020
Bye. Come on away, Miss Abba. Yeah, in
about an hour. Oh, come on.

58
00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:00,040
Cats have nine lives to one of ours.

59
00:04:04,260 --> 00:04:05,420
342 to a cat.

60
00:04:06,060 --> 00:04:07,480
What would you like for your breakfast?

61
00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:09,540
Nothing. Oh, nothing at all?

62
00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:14,260
No. How about fried eggs, fried bacon?

63
00:04:14,760 --> 00:04:17,320
Fried tomatoes, fried bread and beans.

64
00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:18,680
Sounds disgusting.

65
00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:20,120
Or I'll fry the beans.

66
00:04:20,339 --> 00:04:23,720
No. I'll just have some plain yoghurt
and some dry toast.

67
00:04:25,340 --> 00:04:31,380
I thought it was the cholesterol and I
wanted to say... Ben, we have this every

68
00:04:31,380 --> 00:04:35,780
time. You're exactly a day older than
you were yesterday when you were quite

69
00:04:35,780 --> 00:04:38,500
right. It's not the age, it's the
mileage.

70
00:04:39,020 --> 00:04:40,040
What's that supposed to mean?

71
00:04:40,340 --> 00:04:43,360
When I was 18, I had plans.

72
00:04:44,060 --> 00:04:44,899
So did I.

73
00:04:44,900 --> 00:04:45,960
No, I mean real plans.

74
00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:47,840
Yes.

75
00:04:47,980 --> 00:04:50,960
Well, you do things. Be somebody. I
mean, look at me. What have I achieved?

76
00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:51,859
A lot.

77
00:04:51,860 --> 00:04:55,900
What? Well, we've got a nice house.
Double mortgaged. Our health. Luck.

78
00:04:56,120 --> 00:04:57,200
The kids. You had those.

79
00:04:57,440 --> 00:04:58,440
You were involved.

80
00:04:58,520 --> 00:04:59,520
I don't mean those things.

81
00:05:00,060 --> 00:05:01,060
Well, what?

82
00:05:02,300 --> 00:05:05,600
I need people to look up to me.

83
00:05:05,940 --> 00:05:07,560
Well, Christine's quite short.

84
00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:14,000
I'll see you later.

85
00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:22,640
You don't put on weight?

86
00:05:24,460 --> 00:05:27,080
Well, I don't know, really.

87
00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:31,280
My jeans seem tighter suddenly and I
don't think they've shrunk.

88
00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:34,900
Are you all right?

89
00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:37,540
Oh, sorry, I was miles away.

90
00:05:38,260 --> 00:05:39,600
Still worrying about Ben?

91
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:40,940
Yes.

92
00:05:42,250 --> 00:05:43,250
What exactly happened?

93
00:05:44,630 --> 00:05:45,630
Nothing, really.

94
00:05:46,250 --> 00:05:49,230
Just when he went off to work, he looked
so lost.

95
00:05:49,670 --> 00:05:54,830
He didn't even take his beavis and
butthead insulated cola can cover with

96
00:05:54,830 --> 00:05:55,830
integral straw.

97
00:05:56,910 --> 00:06:00,110
That's the one that's... This is cool
and that sucks, yes.

98
00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:04,450
I've never known him quite like this.

99
00:06:04,850 --> 00:06:07,030
He's usually so optimistic.

100
00:06:07,830 --> 00:06:10,590
Every year at birthday time, it's
getting a bit worse.

101
00:06:10,810 --> 00:06:11,810
Oh, don't.

102
00:06:12,190 --> 00:06:15,430
I'll never forget the first time I
looked in the mirror and saw my mother's

103
00:06:15,430 --> 00:06:16,430
looking at me.

104
00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:21,350
Or in my case, Aunty Pearl's. You're
lucky it meets your Aunty Pearl as a

105
00:06:21,550 --> 00:06:25,390
My mother's just a loose collection of
features, like a bag of Bob Stoppies

106
00:06:25,390 --> 00:06:26,930
in the glove compartment on a hot day.

107
00:06:29,630 --> 00:06:31,070
Different for men, though, isn't it?

108
00:06:31,370 --> 00:06:32,530
It's not so much looks.

109
00:06:32,930 --> 00:06:36,270
They need to believe they're still...
You know.

110
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:37,730
Or they can't.

111
00:06:38,650 --> 00:06:39,650
Obviously.

112
00:06:40,490 --> 00:06:41,930
with something I could do or say.

113
00:06:42,470 --> 00:06:45,430
He's probably moping about out there
somewhere right now.

114
00:06:46,790 --> 00:06:48,390
Have you nearly finished these cakes?

115
00:06:48,750 --> 00:06:49,750
Yes, why?

116
00:06:50,390 --> 00:06:52,450
Why don't you deliver them now instead
of this afternoon?

117
00:06:53,010 --> 00:06:55,990
I can do the sandwich run on my own for
once and you can get home early.

118
00:06:56,290 --> 00:06:59,870
Would you? Then I can get back and do
something really special for when he

119
00:06:59,870 --> 00:07:01,730
home. Or even something to eat.

120
00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:03,130
Thank you.

121
00:07:07,970 --> 00:07:08,970
We've got to rush.

122
00:07:09,310 --> 00:07:10,590
An overflow in Muswell Hill.

123
00:07:10,830 --> 00:07:12,370
Bye, Ray. Yes, see you. Bye, there.

124
00:07:13,110 --> 00:07:15,470
Here we are, then. Two fresh coffees.

125
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:17,110
There's a chip in this mug.

126
00:07:17,390 --> 00:07:18,510
It's perfectly clean.

127
00:07:18,790 --> 00:07:19,790
I don't care.

128
00:07:20,050 --> 00:07:21,890
I don't want it in my coffee.

129
00:07:25,730 --> 00:07:26,730
There you are, then.

130
00:07:27,010 --> 00:07:32,090
Thanks. Oh, come on, cheer up. It's like
spending the old day moping about with

131
00:07:32,090 --> 00:07:33,090
a wet dishcloth.

132
00:07:33,410 --> 00:07:34,410
What's wrong with that?

133
00:07:35,250 --> 00:07:36,970
Step out of it.

134
00:07:37,210 --> 00:07:38,210
Pass the shoe, will you?

135
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:42,400
Oh, thank you, God, for making my
morning.

136
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:45,000
Morning, Sean.

137
00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:48,760
Gives the fill up?

138
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:50,760
Tea with milk and a ham salad.

139
00:07:51,020 --> 00:07:52,020
F -A -B.

140
00:07:53,380 --> 00:07:57,660
Don't look now, but Jake Tlinger just
walked in in a really stupid outfit.

141
00:07:58,060 --> 00:07:59,060
Oh.

142
00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:01,200
Well, turn round and say something.

143
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,000
Hi, Jake.

144
00:08:04,260 --> 00:08:05,880
Well, if it isn't Ben Porter.

145
00:08:10,820 --> 00:08:11,820
Nice outfit.

146
00:08:13,140 --> 00:08:15,760
What's wrong with you?

147
00:08:15,980 --> 00:08:16,980
What do you want me to say?

148
00:08:17,180 --> 00:08:18,180
What?

149
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:20,460
Did you hurt your foot then?

150
00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:21,579
Hurt my foot?

151
00:08:21,580 --> 00:08:23,320
When you fell off the Christmas tree.

152
00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:29,280
I'm sorry, I do apologise for my
assistant. She sometimes gets

153
00:08:29,540 --> 00:08:32,179
Don't apologise for me. Shut up and
drink your coffee.

154
00:08:32,419 --> 00:08:33,940
Your apology is accepted.

155
00:08:34,179 --> 00:08:35,179
Good.

156
00:08:35,919 --> 00:08:40,460
I never thought I'd live to see the day
when you... Apologise to Jake Klinger.

157
00:08:40,500 --> 00:08:41,820
What does it all matter anyway?

158
00:08:42,580 --> 00:08:43,900
Come on, let's go.

159
00:08:44,100 --> 00:08:45,520
I'm not going till I'm finished.

160
00:08:45,920 --> 00:08:47,300
I'll wait for you in the van then.

161
00:08:55,860 --> 00:08:57,040
Oh, my God!

162
00:09:15,660 --> 00:09:17,400
The purple plug.

163
00:09:23,880 --> 00:09:25,160
Oh, it's you again.

164
00:09:25,720 --> 00:09:27,100
Oh, nice outfit.

165
00:09:27,580 --> 00:09:28,660
Having lunch with Barbie and Ken?

166
00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:34,340
This is the authentic Thunderbird
uniform of Scott Tracy.

167
00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:35,960
Well, I knew it couldn't be brains.

168
00:09:37,940 --> 00:09:39,360
I've changed your chain.

169
00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:41,220
Here, what do you... Chalk, lock the
door.

170
00:09:41,460 --> 00:09:42,940
Why? Because.

171
00:09:44,030 --> 00:09:47,390
Ben Porter has arrived.

172
00:09:49,490 --> 00:09:50,890
Oh, wow!

173
00:09:51,310 --> 00:09:55,410
I've never actually seen one. Found it
under my wiper. It's a fake. Somebody's

174
00:09:55,410 --> 00:09:56,069
kidding you.

175
00:09:56,070 --> 00:09:57,070
You think so?

176
00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:59,450
I've tried for years to get one. Even I
never get a sniff.

177
00:09:59,830 --> 00:10:00,830
What is it?

178
00:10:00,930 --> 00:10:02,750
The Purple Plug!

179
00:10:03,630 --> 00:10:05,090
An invitation.

180
00:10:05,550 --> 00:10:06,509
To what?

181
00:10:06,510 --> 00:10:10,450
Only to become a member of the most
exclusive fraternal society that

182
00:10:10,450 --> 00:10:11,439
can offer.

183
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:13,940
the venerable Brotherhood of the
Plunger.

184
00:10:16,120 --> 00:10:17,120
What's that?

185
00:10:17,180 --> 00:10:20,640
Oh, it's just a lot of idiots who meet
and dress up in stupid -looking outfits.

186
00:10:23,420 --> 00:10:25,440
Jealous? Yeah, what if I am?

187
00:10:26,020 --> 00:10:32,240
The Plungers are the most distinguished
club, open only to the chosen elite of

188
00:10:32,240 --> 00:10:33,079
the profession.

189
00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:34,600
So who's in this thing, then?

190
00:10:34,840 --> 00:10:35,840
Nobody knows.

191
00:10:36,300 --> 00:10:37,840
What do you mean, nobody knows?

192
00:10:38,200 --> 00:10:40,980
Could be anybody and everybody. Nobody
knows.

193
00:10:41,370 --> 00:10:43,330
You mean it's a secret society?

194
00:10:43,970 --> 00:10:45,850
It is a secret society.

195
00:10:46,190 --> 00:10:48,410
There's nothing secret about it. Hello?

196
00:10:48,750 --> 00:10:49,750
Get down!

197
00:10:53,550 --> 00:10:54,630
It's your wife.

198
00:10:54,930 --> 00:10:55,930
Tell her.

199
00:10:56,010 --> 00:11:00,770
It's just that no plumber may divulge
any details of the society to any living

200
00:11:00,770 --> 00:11:04,930
person, except for another plumber, or
honorary plumber, even wives or

201
00:11:04,930 --> 00:11:06,190
girlfriends. Why not?

202
00:11:06,490 --> 00:11:09,450
There was this bloke in Camden. He told
his wife some secrets of the

203
00:11:09,450 --> 00:11:12,670
brotherhood. Three days later, they
found him dead in his bed.

204
00:11:13,470 --> 00:11:14,470
He was 84.

205
00:11:14,810 --> 00:11:15,810
That's got nothing to do with it.

206
00:11:16,850 --> 00:11:18,610
Are you OK?

207
00:11:19,110 --> 00:11:21,050
Remember. What's the point, sir?

208
00:11:27,690 --> 00:11:29,330
Hi, we didn't know you were there.

209
00:11:29,770 --> 00:11:30,810
Is this door locked?

210
00:11:31,090 --> 00:11:34,190
No, the catch must have dropped. It does
that, doesn't it, Sean?

211
00:11:34,450 --> 00:11:35,450
No.

212
00:11:35,650 --> 00:11:36,730
Yes, it does.

213
00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:40,440
For plumbers.

214
00:11:44,940 --> 00:11:45,940
Hello, Jake.

215
00:11:46,320 --> 00:11:47,820
Hello. Nice to meet you.

216
00:11:48,180 --> 00:11:49,180
Goodbye.

217
00:11:51,180 --> 00:11:52,220
What's the matter with him?

218
00:11:52,440 --> 00:11:54,300
Rust job. He just got a call from
Thunderbird 5.

219
00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:56,080
What are you doing here?

220
00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:59,700
I thought you'd be pleased to see me.
Oh, well, yes, of course I am.

221
00:12:00,060 --> 00:12:01,060
What are you doing here?

222
00:12:03,120 --> 00:12:06,060
Two lemon meringue, two chocolate and
two apple and cinnamon, right?

223
00:12:06,340 --> 00:12:07,880
Yeah, that's what we agreed. I'll just
be a minute.

224
00:12:13,100 --> 00:12:15,500
Take the van and the appointment books
before she gets suspicious.

225
00:12:15,900 --> 00:12:16,699
On my own?

226
00:12:16,700 --> 00:12:18,920
It's just a leaky ball cock and a
replacement time switch.

227
00:12:19,300 --> 00:12:20,279
What's the hurry?

228
00:12:20,280 --> 00:12:23,580
The plug is just an invitation. Now I
have to wait for further instructions.

229
00:12:24,420 --> 00:12:27,700
Instructions? It's for you. Go, go, go.
It's all right. I'm going.

230
00:12:34,680 --> 00:12:35,680
Hello?

231
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:37,360
Mr Ben Porter.

232
00:12:38,120 --> 00:12:39,540
You received our invitation.

233
00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,400
Yes. How did you know where to contact
me?

234
00:12:42,750 --> 00:12:46,210
We're watching you very carefully, Mr.
Porter.

235
00:12:46,790 --> 00:12:50,050
I was very honoured. Are you willing to
proceed?

236
00:12:50,930 --> 00:12:51,930
Yes,

237
00:12:53,390 --> 00:12:54,990
that'll be fine.

238
00:12:55,210 --> 00:12:58,010
Then you must now prove yourself worthy.

239
00:12:58,570 --> 00:13:00,090
And what exactly do you mean by that?

240
00:13:00,410 --> 00:13:01,410
Who is that?

241
00:13:01,590 --> 00:13:07,710
Hello. Tell me, Mr. Porter, exactly what
would you be willing to do to confirm

242
00:13:07,710 --> 00:13:09,150
your membership to us?

243
00:13:09,780 --> 00:13:15,440
Meaning what? Well, it's up to you to
show us just how much you want to join

244
00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:18,260
Brotherhood of the Plunger in public.

245
00:13:19,440 --> 00:13:22,340
How would I do that? Three o 'clock in
the High Road.

246
00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:27,500
If you succeed in convincing us of your
worthiness, someone will be in touch.

247
00:13:28,300 --> 00:13:29,420
It's all up to you.

248
00:13:30,040 --> 00:13:36,220
Did I see Christine leave in the van?

249
00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:41,539
Nothing, nothing.

250
00:13:41,540 --> 00:13:42,540
I'm fine.

251
00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:45,580
I just have to be somewhere really
quickly. Sean, have you got a number for

252
00:13:45,580 --> 00:13:47,280
minicab? It's all right. I'll drop you
off.

253
00:13:50,820 --> 00:13:53,000
What's in those bags? Just drop me at
the end of the high street.

254
00:13:55,100 --> 00:13:56,100
Do you want me to wait?

255
00:13:56,220 --> 00:13:57,220
No.

256
00:13:57,660 --> 00:13:59,840
It's, uh... It might take some time.

257
00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:07,819
What are you looking at me?

258
00:14:07,820 --> 00:14:08,589
I'm not.

259
00:14:08,590 --> 00:14:11,470
at you. Yes, you were. And what were you
doing in the trap this morning? You

260
00:14:11,470 --> 00:14:13,870
know what. I came to deliver the cakes.

261
00:14:15,570 --> 00:14:16,570
Oh.

262
00:14:29,110 --> 00:14:30,110
I'll be off then.

263
00:14:30,130 --> 00:14:31,130
Right.

264
00:14:34,270 --> 00:14:35,730
Well, bye then.

265
00:14:40,330 --> 00:14:43,090
Because you're a bit depressed today.
You wouldn't be tempted to do anything

266
00:14:43,090 --> 00:14:44,690
silly, would you?

267
00:14:45,190 --> 00:14:46,190
I was not.

268
00:14:47,010 --> 00:14:48,010
Don't worry.

269
00:15:06,190 --> 00:15:09,010
No, I can't do this. This is just
stupid.

270
00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:13,839
That's right.

271
00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:15,120
Climb in with the rubbish.

272
00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:20,280
Then never let a loser like you in,
whatever you did.

273
00:15:23,540 --> 00:15:24,540
Rot!

274
00:17:40,170 --> 00:17:41,170
Are you going to talk to us?

275
00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:45,430
Kids, I think you'd better go upstairs.

276
00:17:46,430 --> 00:17:50,250
Why? They're obviously going to have an
argument. We are not going to have an

277
00:17:50,250 --> 00:17:51,790
argument. We're just going to talk.

278
00:17:52,190 --> 00:17:53,790
So do we still have to go upstairs?

279
00:17:54,230 --> 00:17:57,630
Yes. I don't see why. They deserve an
explanation just as much as I do.

280
00:17:57,870 --> 00:17:59,070
Well, at least let Davy go upstairs.

281
00:17:59,370 --> 00:18:01,210
Why should she stay down and not me?

282
00:18:01,410 --> 00:18:04,790
I'd rather go upstairs. I don't want to
be involved in a row. OK, you go up and

283
00:18:04,790 --> 00:18:07,210
I'll stay down. All right. I'd like you
both to stay down here.

284
00:18:07,510 --> 00:18:09,890
But I want to go upstairs. I'd prefer
you to stay.

285
00:18:10,140 --> 00:18:11,140
Can I go upstairs, then?

286
00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:14,880
Not until you're told exactly what you
think you were doing in the high street.

287
00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:17,080
Harry, go in your basket.

288
00:18:19,620 --> 00:18:20,620
Look,

289
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:26,520
I know it might seem rather strange, but
the thing is,

290
00:18:26,580 --> 00:18:28,920
it was something I had to do.

291
00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:34,200
You had to buy 50 sink plungers and
cavort about with them in the middle of

292
00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:35,200
street? Yes.

293
00:18:35,620 --> 00:18:38,820
And as head of this household, I don't
expect any further questioning of my

294
00:18:38,820 --> 00:18:39,820
reasoning.

295
00:18:41,710 --> 00:18:43,350
really. I don't know why we wondered
about it.

296
00:18:45,410 --> 00:18:46,910
You're being sarcastic, aren't you?

297
00:18:47,130 --> 00:18:48,109
Not at all.

298
00:18:48,110 --> 00:18:52,450
What is a man in his own house if he
can't act like a complete loony in a

299
00:18:52,450 --> 00:18:55,870
place without his foolish wife and
children wanting to know the reason why?

300
00:18:56,110 --> 00:18:57,230
Please don't ask me why.

301
00:18:57,450 --> 00:18:58,450
Why not?

302
00:18:58,710 --> 00:19:00,010
Please, just don't.

303
00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:04,930
Look, just trust me on this one. You
don't want to know. You really don't

304
00:19:04,930 --> 00:19:05,930
to know.

305
00:19:07,870 --> 00:19:08,870
Yes, I do.

306
00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:13,720
did you do it?

307
00:19:13,860 --> 00:19:15,340
I'm forbidden to say. Why?

308
00:19:16,100 --> 00:19:17,640
Because I'm not allowed to. Why?

309
00:19:17,900 --> 00:19:18,900
Because it's forbidden!

310
00:19:19,540 --> 00:19:20,540
I see.

311
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:24,520
So it's got nothing to do with joining
the Brotherhood of the Plungers, then?

312
00:19:24,900 --> 00:19:27,940
What? The Brotherhood of the Plungers.

313
00:19:28,140 --> 00:19:29,119
How did you know that?

314
00:19:29,120 --> 00:19:33,840
Ben, do you seriously think that a bunch
of plumbers could put on silly hats and

315
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:37,200
creep about municipal buildings at night
without their wives noticing?

316
00:19:37,540 --> 00:19:38,540
It's a secret!

317
00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:42,140
No, it isn't. We all joke about it when
we meet up.

318
00:19:42,380 --> 00:19:44,560
I assumed you already were one. So did
I.

319
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:46,320
You mean you know about it as well?

320
00:19:46,660 --> 00:19:50,300
Everybody knows about it. Donna showed
me her dad's costume once and we had a

321
00:19:50,300 --> 00:19:50,859
good laugh.

322
00:19:50,860 --> 00:19:53,120
You can't know about it! It's not gay!

323
00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:55,860
How? Things could happen to you.
Horrible things.

324
00:19:56,060 --> 00:19:57,060
What?

325
00:19:58,200 --> 00:19:59,199
Terrible things!

326
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:00,420
Oh, they'll murder us all!

327
00:20:00,740 --> 00:20:02,840
No! But what will they do to us then?

328
00:20:03,040 --> 00:20:06,940
Perhaps they'll come in the night and
block up our drains. Or make our taps

329
00:20:06,940 --> 00:20:08,460
dribble. Quiet!

330
00:20:08,700 --> 00:20:09,700
It's dangerous!

331
00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:11,660
Oh, dangerous, is it?

332
00:20:21,820 --> 00:20:25,320
schoolboys with their own special
schoolboy signs and their own special

333
00:20:25,320 --> 00:20:26,500
schoolboy costumes.

334
00:20:26,940 --> 00:20:28,480
It's a very respected society.

335
00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:30,340
It's very dignified and democratic.

336
00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:33,060
So why were you waving plungers about in
the street?

337
00:20:33,300 --> 00:20:34,119
They made me.

338
00:20:34,120 --> 00:20:37,380
They told you to go out and make a
complete fool of yourself. It was a

339
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:40,960
Did you pass? I don't know. Someone's
supposed to contact me. How?

340
00:20:41,180 --> 00:20:44,200
Well, they're watching. They're always
watching. How can they be always

341
00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:45,820
watching? That's ridiculous.

342
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:49,360
Ben Porter, we have been watching you.

343
00:20:53,710 --> 00:20:58,270
to proceed further, contact us before 4
.30 at the number that will shortly be

344
00:20:58,270 --> 00:20:59,270
passed to you.

345
00:20:59,750 --> 00:21:02,030
The next step is up to you.

346
00:21:03,870 --> 00:21:06,670
I'm going upstairs.

347
00:21:07,110 --> 00:21:08,650
Yeah, I've got that. Now

348
00:21:08,650 --> 00:21:18,630
what?

349
00:21:19,770 --> 00:21:22,270
You think this is stupid, don't you? No.

350
00:21:22,700 --> 00:21:23,700
Well, maybe it is.

351
00:21:24,120 --> 00:21:25,120
That's all I've got.

352
00:21:30,160 --> 00:21:36,000
Ben, you don't have to be a member of
this fancy dress party to be well

353
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:37,000
of.

354
00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:39,880
Plenty of people respect you. Oh,
really?

355
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:41,220
Yes, really.

356
00:21:41,820 --> 00:21:46,560
And for what you actually are, a good
man who does his job well.

357
00:21:48,180 --> 00:21:50,700
The kids are proud of you, and so am I.

358
00:21:51,340 --> 00:21:52,340
Are you?

359
00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:54,640
Of course.

360
00:22:02,200 --> 00:22:03,440
Now, shall I throw this away?

361
00:22:03,940 --> 00:22:04,940
No, give it to me.

362
00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:08,720
I'll throw it away.

363
00:22:09,860 --> 00:22:12,520
And if that's the master of the lodge,
tell him to get knotted.

364
00:22:14,120 --> 00:22:17,780
I'm not you. No, this won't take a
moment. Come on, I'm not in any mood for

365
00:22:17,780 --> 00:22:18,960
of your games. No games.

366
00:22:19,740 --> 00:22:21,080
I just want to say something.

367
00:22:21,360 --> 00:22:22,360
What?

368
00:22:22,410 --> 00:22:25,970
I'm sorry I was a bit sharp earlier in
the caps. They were great, I suppose.

369
00:22:27,590 --> 00:22:32,670
It's just that I've never been invited
to join, and I've always felt quite bad

370
00:22:32,670 --> 00:22:33,589
about that.

371
00:22:33,590 --> 00:22:40,330
Yeah? I know we've had our
disagreements, but I just want to say, I

372
00:22:40,330 --> 00:22:43,590
if anybody should be a member, it's you.

373
00:22:44,450 --> 00:22:46,990
I want to wish you the best of luck.

374
00:22:48,230 --> 00:22:49,950
Thanks. And I hope they take you.

375
00:22:51,070 --> 00:22:52,070
Cheers.

376
00:22:52,810 --> 00:22:56,870
Tonight, when you're there, I'll be
thinking about you.

377
00:22:59,850 --> 00:23:00,850
Bye.

378
00:23:23,950 --> 00:23:27,350
Yeah, I was asked to call this number by
4 .30 if I wanted to proceed.

379
00:23:28,030 --> 00:23:29,390
Yeah, yeah, OK.

380
00:23:30,130 --> 00:23:32,150
Oh, really?

381
00:23:33,450 --> 00:23:34,650
Yeah, yeah, OK.

382
00:23:34,910 --> 00:23:36,170
Right. Bye.

383
00:23:40,750 --> 00:23:42,670
It's all right. I'm not going to say
anything.

384
00:23:43,250 --> 00:23:46,490
If this thing is so important to you,
I'll support you.

385
00:23:46,890 --> 00:23:47,890
I have to do this.

386
00:23:48,270 --> 00:23:49,290
You'll understand later.

387
00:23:49,590 --> 00:23:50,590
I dare say.

388
00:23:50,730 --> 00:23:51,850
What time will you be back?

389
00:23:52,270 --> 00:23:54,130
Um, well, that's not... Quite all.

390
00:23:54,390 --> 00:23:55,390
What then?

391
00:23:55,650 --> 00:24:00,490
Well, they just told me it seems they've
updated the rules in the light of more

392
00:24:00,490 --> 00:24:01,830
modern ideals of equality.

393
00:24:03,330 --> 00:24:04,330
Yes?

394
00:24:10,610 --> 00:24:14,390
Brothers of Plunger are all here
assembled.

395
00:24:19,490 --> 00:24:22,630
Acknowledge the master installed on his
throne.

396
00:24:29,260 --> 00:24:31,100
to let in a stranger.

397
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:39,080
Open the casement and let him be

398
00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:40,080
shown.

399
00:24:41,760 --> 00:24:48,620
Now is there another who travels here
with him to

400
00:24:48,620 --> 00:24:52,080
share in his burden and lighten his
load?

401
00:24:59,470 --> 00:25:04,810
sanctum sanctorum, receiving the badge
of our most sacred trade.

402
00:25:05,650 --> 00:25:12,430
Now are you ready to cast off

403
00:25:12,430 --> 00:25:17,290
your darkness, look upon virtue, and
enter our Lord?

404
00:25:17,690 --> 00:25:20,470
Yea, Master, yea.

405
00:25:26,010 --> 00:25:28,530
Now must the supplicant

406
00:25:29,230 --> 00:25:30,230
the High Master.

407
00:25:30,510 --> 00:25:34,350
Kneel to him humbly and swear to obey.

408
00:25:45,950 --> 00:25:52,270
Now must the supplicant face the High
Master. Kneel to him humbly

409
00:26:00,659 --> 00:26:06,260
Nothing. You're appointed to kneel at
this point and swear abeyance to the

410
00:26:06,260 --> 00:26:08,140
Master. Ah, yes.

411
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:09,900
The High Master.

412
00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:17,000
I have to show what I think of the High
Master. Well, this is what I think of

413
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:18,360
the High Master.

414
00:26:20,120 --> 00:26:21,460
This is outrageous!

415
00:26:22,140 --> 00:26:28,160
Do you really think I was going to be
fooled into thinking that this was the

416
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:29,160
real thing?

417
00:26:30,410 --> 00:26:36,990
I mean, hell will freeze over before I
promise to obey Jake Klinger.

418
00:26:39,510 --> 00:26:43,110
You mean, what the hell do you think
you're doing?

419
00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:47,710
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